Codependency (noun): Lesbianism?

Posted by Tilia

So, to anyone who ever tries to move abroad, bear in mind the following: Having a friend just as foreign and unemployed as you is invaluable, but everyone’s going to think you’re dating.

That’s right, folks.  The respective new people in our lives, including my very Jewish landlord, and Jane’s boho roommates are all pretty much convinced that Jane and I are “together.”  

We get sly comments like, “Ach! your friend, she is always here, no?” and “Um, Jane … did she move over here … for you?” and no matter how much we digress, they’re all pretty much convinced that Jane and I are doing the sappho mambo.  

The funny thing is, sometimes we behave in ways that enforce this suspicion.  No, not by having naked pillow fights and then making out, but rather by seeing each other every day or occasionally getting into arguments where it’s necessary to discuss our communication faults, and how we can fix them.  

Jane’s Indian paramour even got suspicious the other day when she was forced to end their phone conversation because she needed to go make me dinner.  Truly, she was making us both dinner, but I’m sure Kip is now trying to figure out exactly what kind of threat I am.  

The highlight, so far, of this whole thing, for me, was probably last night.  Jane was sitting at my computer when my landlord showed up in the middle of the effing night (again), and I paid him what was left of this month’s rent.  He sort of peeked into my room and, upon seeing Jane, said the thing about her always being here with a big, goofy smile.

“I’m not always here,” Jane snapped.  ”It was just the two times you’ve come by.”  Which is true.

“Oh, perhaps I phrase this wrong …” Landlord said, literally taking a step back.

“No, the thing is, I’m really not always here,” Jane insisted, acidly.  

“Oh, okay.  It is not a problem.  You are welcome here, do not misunderstand …”

“That’s great, but I’m not always here.”

etc.

This plays into when I came to view the flat, and Jane was with me, and he looked from one of us to the other and made sure it was just me moving in, and that I wouldn’t suddenly move a “friend” in with me.  We both assumed he’d meant boyfriends at the time, but less than an hour later, it clicked what he’d really assumed.

In fact, he’s never even seen me without Jane happening to be there.  This really is a matter of coincidence, since if we’re hanging out at home, most of the time, we’re at Jane’s pad.  And usually we’re not at home; we’re at a pub or a park.  We do like parks.  

So, yeah, dear readers – this blog, started by two women about their respective adventures with men, is now written by two women who are likely assumed by many to be “that hot American lesbian couple.”

My mother would be so proud.

~ by Shannon on August 21, 2008.